A Domestic Violence Survivor’s Journey

Maryam, a domestic violence survivor, shares her story about the struggles she has gone through during her years of abuse. She shares her story about how she learned to love herself again after discovering self-love.

What Happens When You Get Out of an Abusive Relationship

The day you decide to leave is the moment that your abuser realizes that you will not live in fear. It is the day they lash out at their most vulnerable prey; this time, it is you. You are not safe because your abuser will try to find any way possible to scare you into coming back.

Read: One in three women have suffered physical or sexual violence

Knowing When to Get Out

A domestic violence survivor’s journey is not an easy one. If you find yourself in a situation where you feel like you cannot get out of, please know that you are not alone and there is help available. There are many different organizations that can provide assistance with everything from your safety to helping you get the things that you need to start over.

The Shock and Hurt of the Violence

One of the reasons I chose to leave my abusive relationship was the hurt I felt every time he hurt me. It was one thing when he would push or shove me, but it was another when he slapped me so hard that I flew across the room to hit the wall. That kind of physical violence reminds you that you are powerless to do anything about his anger and outbursts.

The Aftermath

It has been a year and a half since the day I was called in to see my abuser. That day he entered the courtroom with me, shackled, smiling, spitting at the guard’s feet, then leering at me. He was sentenced to 8 years in prison for crimes including aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, strangulation, intimidation of a witness, and battery. What finally made him stop? The realization that he would never be able to control me again, not in this life anyway.

Read: Angelina Jolie accuses Brad Pitt of Domestic Violence; Son Maddox testifies against Pitt

Healing from Domestic Violence

I have spent the better part of my life being abused.

Finding Self-Love Again

Finding love again can feel impossible, but it’s not. It’s a matter of practice and determination. There is nothing more powerful than the ability to fill your own void with self-love. This is why it’s important to remember that you’ll never find the one who wants to love you as much as you want to love yourself. So instead of waiting for someone else, make a commitment to loving yourself today.

Supporting Someone Else in Domestic Violence

I get many messages from people who are worried about friends, family members, or loved ones who are in abusive relationships. The best advice I can give you is to be there for them. There are a lot of resources out there that can help you take the next steps with someone else’s safety in mind–this includes hotlines, shelters, and other programs that provide counselling and support.

Conclusion

I am no longer scared, I am no longer an abuse victim. Today, I’m a survivor.

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